Another day, another dollar. Another week, and another installment of “This Week in the World of Storage Hunting”!
A storage facility in Fletcher, North Carolina (just shy of Storage Unit Auction List’s headquarters in Asheville) is probably hurting after a renegade car went careening into the side of one of their storage units early Thursday morning. The suspect, James Jefferson Keeter, was seen driving down the road at speeds of over 70 mph. When the police took pursuit, Keeter refused to stop, passed vehicles in no passing zones, and ran a red light and a stop sign before finally losing control of his vehicle on a sharp left turn. This is when Keeter’s car ran off the road and smashed into the side of a storage unit at Green Mountain Trailer Park Secure Self Storage. Ironically enough, Keeter did not even have a reason for fleeing from police, and was not impaired during the car chase. Maybe it was simply the thrill of the chase, or maybe he just wanted to get arrested and be held on a $2,000 bond. Makes sense! Oh yeah, he is also thought to have caused at least $8,000 worth of damage to the building. Ouch.
Are you all familiar with Henny Youngman’s famous one liner “Take my wife–please”? Well, a couple in Georgia got a new spin on an old joke when a woman at a storage auction asked them, “Take my kids–please.” Except this time, it was no joke. After the storage auction, the husband and wife noticed a woman and two ragged children with no shoes entering a storage unit, which they were living in. After confronting the woman and offering to buy her and her children new clothing at WalMart, the woman refused and instead propositioned that the couple take her kids, as she was in no financial standing to care for them herself. Obviously, these two people have hearts of gold, because after a few moments of consideration, and a year of legal arrangements, the children are now living happily with their new family in Georgia. While most people go to storage auctions in hopes of finding treasures, some people come home with two new kids. No big deal. Just another day in the life of a storage hunter.
Sure, Hawaii is gorgeous, but it’s so tiny, so laid back, you’re bound to get bored and restless. So what do you do when the daily doldrums of island living start getting the best of you? You go to a tuna auction, of course! In the fashion of Storage Wars, auctioneers in Honolulu hold weekly tuna auctions, in which bidders follow the auctioneer around a large, presumably stinky room stuffed to the gills with slabs of tuna meet in hopes of catching a good deal. Bids generally start at 10 cents per pound, but this year a prime piece of Hawaiian ahi meat went for a whopping $24.50 per pound. You’ve got to make sure you have deep pockets if you’re looking to attend; the regulars (or..should I call them whales?!) at these auctions don’t mess around. Much like storage hunters, these regulars are buying and selling fish for a living, and refuse to be outbid by newbies. Sounds like it could be pretty thrilling! Ah, I can see it now: “A&E’s new reality show spin-off, ‘Tuna Wars: Hawaii’…coming this Fall.”
Enjoy the rest of your weekend, everyone!